i remember when Molls was born. Cai was only 7 & it felt like i had 5 very small children.
It felt like a very demanding little season in my life. Physically, emotionally, spiritually - i needed to be on my game constantly - keeping all the plates spinning, all the little ones cared for, all my duties accomplished.
In a way...
i feel like i'm re-entering that season.
Not in the same bleary eyed, "everyone in this house is a little person" way... but in a different sort of "spinning plates" way.
This year, Miss Mollen enters grade 1, so i'll have those same 5 children - all in school. Some of them are older & less dependent than others - but still - i feel like i have 5 school aged children who still need a lot of mama's input. (grades 9, 7, 5, 3 & 1).
Add to that, 2 adorable boys who need some of mama too...
& i realize why i have put off the nitty gritty planning of the year until now. Yes, i had my year planned out in broad strokes a couple months ago - but this week, i put pen to paper & figured out a little road map how i'm hoping to get there...
i made up some goals to be met by the end of September (haven't done that *for real* in awhile). i'm looking forward to seeing how close we can get - if i can continue at that pace, we'll put in an excellent year this year - & if not, i'll modify for October :)
i feel like i'm at the top of a crazy fast water slide - & i'm scootching my bum forward, waiting for the current to catch me & hurl me down, spiraling out of control, splashing water over the edges till i drop in the water at the end - breathless - but blissful.
But right now i'm still at the top.
i decided that i had no idea if what i wrote down was a pipe dream - or if it was something i'd be able to pull off on a daily basis - or at least on an average day, so i organized what Neil called my "dry run".
i told everyone that we were gonna try school in the morning - & everyone needed to be at the table at 8am. Now, obviously there are some things that will be different when we're schooling "for real" - every day - every week... (for example the 2 online courses that will be taken this year that don't begin until September) but i wanted to see if this little routine i mapped out was "do-able".
Turns out it was.
We had a great "trial" day of homeschooling. We usually have little smatterings of starting before we start in earnest: - someone wants to get ahead in their math - books arrive that are too interesting not to crack open - we have cloudy, rainy days & the littles come lookin' for learning... but i feel like i'm ready to pinpoint that day where i say, "we've begun"! & push myself over the edge...
i guess - i'm ready to get wet.