138

i thought it was such an extraordinarily large number that nobody would guess that high. i waited a bit for more, but then i fell asleep & woke up to baby having hiccups again at 6am.
So cute.
i feel so contentedly excited for this little one.
And yet - when i think practically - i realize that - i haven't washed my diapers, i don't have sheets and bedding prepared - and if teeny one were born today - there would be no name prepared to announce. Neil still has 2 business trips to go on (he's on one right now) i'm not sure where the number is of my midwife who i'm supposed to call if i go into labour is. i have a half assembled bed in baby's room... making it impossible to move around in - & Gagey still isn't sleeping through the night.
But then i remember...
i can buy diapers, baby will sleep with me, names will get chosen, & daddy will come home. i can look up the number for the midwife, when daddy comes home, he'll help me finish the bed & prepare the room & the story of this little one's arrival & first days will unfold in happy chaos - just like most babies arrivals & first days.
So, in these last couple of weeks, i'll hold together the threads of my life as i'm able - counting the hiccups in the sleepless wee hours. i'll prepare as i'm able - washing tiny diapers, bedding, blankets. i'll hold my breath till Neil comes home for good - trusting that God is weaving the timing. & i'll bask in the sunlight of these expectant days - enjoying these final weeks of being 'just us 2'.