undignified

i seriously caught about 3 sentences of the pastor's message...
Baby E didn't really feel like settling in - & it just wasn't happening for us last night.
i have been going to church so infrequently since i fractured my patella, it's a good thing that God's not stuck at His house - we are his house - & so He met with me during these weeks...
but back to last night...
As i tried to sit down with Neil and my wiggly, grunty baby at the end, the pastor mentioned in passing the story of King David's undignified dance in front of his scorning wife.
Love that story...
& as the pastor shared how he was challenged in reading the story to allow himself to be made a fool in man's eyes in order to give glory to God, i looked at my own life.
& i kind of laughed as i imagined my undignified dance of motherhood.
The undignified waddle of late pregnancy, the undignified milk that lets down when you talk about your baby, the undignified way you leave the room to tend to your tiny ones, the clothes with spit up, the homeschooling house, the 12 passenger van...
Lacking the dignity to wrap up having babies at a dignified time in your life...
& with a wicked little smile on my face, i whispered to the One i Love...

Father, in my life, i'll become even more undignified than this... & i will give glory to the One to whom i owe everything.
My undignified dance is for You.
All my worship,
all my praise,
& even my daily dance of motherhood.
Let me do it only with a mind and a heart to serve You.
Nothing hindering this passion in my soul.