Thursday, March 3, 2011

writing samples part 1

Writing... one of the hardest things for me to teach as a homeschool mom. It seems each child will grow at their own pace, and learn- eventually - to put words together in coherent sentences on a piece of paper... but it's hard to explain how, exactly, to get from point A to point B.
Each year, our facilitator visits us about 3 times. Each time, she asks for writing samples. This year, i started a folder where i keep all their little writing samples between visits. i make them write me a page of *something, anything* every day. (After the visit, i staple them together and store them elsewhere... i'll probably purge most of it at the end of the year). She likes to have something more 'polished' to look at too - a writing sample that has been edited and reworked to represent the child's best work. Now, i'll be honest - this is usually a big headache for me. BUT, this past week, as i was helping the littles put together their writing samples for our upcoming facilitator visit, i opened up my inbox to find this little gem from my reluctant writer, Peyton.
Brilliant job, sparkling eyed one.
She was inspired by these 2 little figurines she got at the AWANA store that can look different depending on how you look at them.
Earlier this week, i posted an essay that my 9th grader wrote on facebook - we got so many positive comments that i was a little embarrassed - haha - but the topic of her essay was, "Why Home schooling Was the Right Choice For Me" or something like that & it was such an encouraging little paper.
Maybe i'll try to preserve a couple of samples here - to remember the hard work that went into this funny little crevice of our home school journey.
***Edited for clarity and spelling.

Two Friends - by Peyton Beselt, grade 5
I'm going to tell you a tale about a former. Maybe you don't know what a former is. A former is a person who can snap their fingers and become an animal, and then snap their paws and become a human again! The one I will tell you about today was rich, big, and wrinkly. Can you guess what kind of a former he was? He was an elephant prince.
The elephant prince was walking in his garden one day when he saw something in his pine cones. He ran over and looked, and to his surprise, he found a hedgehog; a big, prickly, hedgehog! As the elephant prince watched, from behind his rosebushes, the hedgehog snapped his paws and turned into a dwarf! The elephant prince was astonished and he snapped his paws and turned into a big fat guy. He said, “What are you doing in my pine cones, Sir? I’m phoning the cops!”
“No! Please no! Please don’t phone them! I won’t trespass ever again, please!”
“So what am I supposed do with you now smarty pants? Are you a former?... Answer my question!”
“What do you mean?” The dwarf asked, trying to pretend he didn't know what the prince was talking about.
“Are you a former like me?“ The prince demanded again.
The hedgehog finally gave in, “Yes, but you can’t tell anyone, ok?”
Ok. But only if you don’t tell anyone about me.”
The two agreed not to tell anyone about the other for fear the scientists would take them in for testing like they had done with any formers found in the past.
So the rich prince took the dwarf inside for some real food and something to drink. They talked and talked and soon became good friends. They played every day for weeks, finally feeling like someone else understood them. Neither one told the other former’s secret to anyone. They loved each other so much that one day, the elephant prince invited the hedgehog to come live in his castle for life. The hedgehog agreed to stay and they shared the castle and their friendship grew, until one day there was news of a former discovered in the country - a dwarf that could turn into a hedgehog! The news said that an elephant had informed them about this former who was still in hiding. The hedgehog was watching T.V. in his room when he saw it, and he was certain that his friend, the elephant prince, had betrayed him. He was so sad his tears flooded his house. When the elephant prince came to his quarters on Best Friend Friday to play as they had made a habit of doing, the hedgehog would not let him in or speak to him. The elephant did not know what to say or do, so he just stood outside the door. He started to cry. He didn’t even know what he had done. Then he heard something. It was the dwarf, “I heard that you reported me on T.V... you promised you wouldn't!” he said.
“What? I haven’t even been on T.V. for months!” the elephant said, confused.
“You don’t have to lie, I know what I saw ok? Nobody else knows about me. You're the only one! Just, just leave me alone.” And the hedgehog started to cry again.
“No! I promise I didn’t do anything! Please just listen to me. I promise, I did nothing to hurt your feelings or put you in danger! At least let me see the video.”
Finally the dwarf agreed to watch the video with the prince. As the dwarf watched it a second time, he wondered if he could have been wrong...“But then how did they know about me, Prince?” said the dwarf.
“I don’t know, but I am going to find out. Whoever is responsible will be sorry for what he did to you! Just wait until I find him! But for now, we will have to hide you to keep you safe. They will be looking all over the country for both hedgehogs and dwarves. You will have to be very careful until this all dies down.”
The next day, the dwarf found out that his favourite stuffy was gone! In that moment, he knew that it was his stuffy, Mr. Poopants that had betrayed him! He decided to stay up and see what would happen. Finally, at one in the morning, he saw an elephant sneaking around the corner. As he was about to come in the door, he formed into Mr. Poopants! The dwarf was so mad he grabbed Mr. Poopants and chained him up in his closet. He locked the doors and ran to the palace as fast as he could. He slammed open the door and started screaming, "Elephant!!!!" until the elephant came running down the stairs as fast as he could. When he reached the landing, he found the dwarf in a corner curled up in a little ball crying. The dwarf spilled out everything and started to cry again. The elephant comforted his friend and said that it was ok, he didn’t have to apologize for his accusations.
Suddenly, the dwarf realized that Mr. Poopants was still locked up in the closet. They ran back to the dwarf's room and found him just as he was trying to escape. The elephant kicked him so hard, he landed in the next country. They knew he would never try to tell on them again now that they knew he was a former too! They were safe again!
The friends lived in the castle and spent every Best Friends Friday together forever.


Shari said...

Wow, she has an incredible imagination and writes a good story!!

mamalena said...

What a cute story....inspired by some very cute little thing-a-ma-jigs. Maybe all Peytsie needs is a little inspiration...for a start point. She surely is creative.


Related Posts with Thumbnails