It's funny - it was a pretty average morning... As my sister Stephanie so eloquently put it, "i feel like i'm spending all my SOUL to make it work."
i did my usual - up to the last minute forcing my eyes shut while little feet pummelled my back. My night still a blur of half dream, half wake - baby lovin'.
Finally, rousting my weary bones & tying my hair back without brushing it.
Neil made coffee.
i love that man.
Even though he was already gone... he must've set the timer 'cause he knows just what minute i'll climb jammy clad down those stairs.
Change a diaper, take a little boy potty, nurse the baby, rush to put my toast in & have my bum obediently at the table by 8 ready to 'school' with my stack of morning books by my coffee. i snatched a moment to check my email & my eye caught one from our music pastor, genially reminding me that i'm leading the singing this Sunday. i had forgotten. i'm glad i had stashed some *must do soon* music in a folder by my piano - & i'm glad i get to play this Sunday - the pastor is in the middle of a really thought provoking series called "suburban legends..." & it's hitting on some pretty major myths that we believe about our Father...
But back to my morning...
i wish i could include a sound byte so you could hear the noise.
The thing is - every night - *every night* - i dutifully clean my kitchen & main floor. Even when Neil's gone on business... i don't know - it has become a kind of habit for me i guess. Neil can't stand to come down in the morning if it's not tidied - & so it always manages to get done... somehow.
But within about 15 minutes, you'd never know that. Those long silent hours while we sleep get broken with a SMASH as 9 people descend upon our little kitchen - & the crumbs come dancing across the floors, the fingers make smudging smears across every cleared surface, the baby drools across the floor & it looks... lived in... to put it gently...in an instant.
& that was the case this morning. It wasn't out of the ordinary... it just *was* the ordinary - the ordinary extraordinary chaos.
i liked that morning. As i usually do. Despite the pressing news that i needed to get the music organized. i like doing school with all the littles together.
Even when i feel like i'm yelling over the babbling baby.
Even when i'm pausing mid paragraph because sunshine boy is crying, "Watch meeeeee!! Watch meee!!!!" while he runs his laps around the tiny track that our house is for him.
i like how baby thumps his feet if we sing.
i like how Mollen is a sponge.
i like how my big girls read with expression.
As soon as we finish, i quickly dismiss to do math (at our house, Cai does her own math, Sloanie gets Peyton started first & then does her math, & i do math with the 2 youngest at the kitchen table while tidying up & watching the 2 littlest boys).
i got the 2 littlest 'middlies' going on writing instead, since they can do that independently, while i played my piano with baby pulled up next to me in his highchair. He likes it when i sing and smile at him.... Gagey danced, Charter drummed with his pencil on the table & Miss molls threw back her head & sang along with her full little voice, not pretending very well to get her work done.
Finally, i had some music put together that i thought could work, so i went to email the list to the music pastor... As i sat on our unmade bed & pressed 'send' on the laptop, in my jammies, i wondered when i would get a shower, or get the kitchen cleaned. The children were all diligently working - while the chaos of breakfast held onto it's momentary victory in the ebb & flow of tidiness... & then the phone rang.
"i'll be there in 7 minutes - & i'm bringing my uncle over."
Cai, (did i mention her nickname is radar?) was thankfully listening in on the line & as soon as the phone was hung up - called the troops into action.
When Neil walked in the door - order reigned once more & i was wearing pants.
& so it was that our morning played itself out.... & after a few unexpected leaps & lurches, we plowed on into the afternoon.
One of those ordinary mornings... that toss you in the air like a brittle fall leaf. Gonna enjoy my spiraling journey back to earth.