i broke my little pledge to myself that i would know when my next visit was by the time i arrived home from the current visit.
There are no hard and fast rules - just ideas to help myself to stay soft, and follow through on my convictions. & as it turned out - this Monday - i found myself soft and aching already - ready to check the vigil schedule for an empty spot that i could fill.
My friend sent me a message that she could go today - & so she drove to my house, where it was almost like we picked up our littles in a shaker to decide who would come and who would stay.
With her van full of our mixed set - we left the rest at home to nap and play till we were done.
After ten minutes of driving, i realized that i hadn't inhaled yet. My friend's eyes were on the road & she was smiling and 'uh-hun'ing to me... but i had been talking non-stop since we pulled away from my house.
There's a freedom that comes from ceasing to sift words so carefully - knowing they will be sifted for you. What comfort when someone understands your deeper meaning. They don't stumble over badly chosen words or smallish ideas. Good friendships are like that - you learn to sift the wheat from the chaff, and you end up covering much ground as a companionable red van barrels down the deerfoot.
Like-mindedness is such a rarity that it's a delicious treat when it's discovered.
And so we prayed... we ached... we talked... we stood in silence.
For the first time, that parking lot wasn't full - and once again i felt that comforting confirmation that i'm to come... and keep coming - till He tells me to quit.