Tuesday, May 25, 2010

single income lotsa kids - how we do it

It's not always easy.
Neil doesn't make a billion dollars a year...
We have moved to make it work, lived on less, eaten in more, vacationed at grandparent's houses. Our littles wear pass me downs & share bedrooms.
Neil has worked hard - i've done my part too...
But he has never...
ever...
made life about money.
He's as generous as they come -
stinginess is not in his vocabulary -
If some one's buying - it hurts his feelings if it's not him.
i love that about him.
i used to sweat the small stuff -
worrying if we could afford his generosity -
till one day it dawned on me...
Would i want to change that part of him?
Would i want two of *me* in our family?
Or possibly... could there be room for two of *him*?
i asked him if he could please take over finances and paying bills - & when he did - i felt a huge release... He was trustworthy, easy-going, conscientious... and smart.
i knew that he was going to take care of us... & so i quit second guessing him.
We had decided when we first got married that we both felt that there was value in having a mama be at home with the little people - & we agreed that we would do everything we could to keep me at home. (At least until they were all in school... haha).
We ended up having to make quite a few sacrifices to make it happen...
but we wouldn't change a thing.
Over the years, i made a few dollars - playing or singing for events, teaching piano for a short season... but there has never been a perfect opportunity for me to contribute in any real financial way to our household without sacrificing too much of what we're doing around here.
& i'm ok with that.
For now, i'll pour into this little crew -
not counting the cost...
Generously giving them beyond what i think i'm able...
taking my cues from my adored one -
& taking stinginess out of my vocabulary.
Life isn't about the money -
& gratitude is born out of that knowledge.

2 comments:

Prvbs31Mama said...

I love this post! We're in the process of switching over who is in charge of the finances. I can't handle it anymore and it just seems like the right thing to do! lol
Thanks for your encouragement through this post!

Denise said...

Life isn't about money ... you're right... but when you wish you could be more generous and you can't because it simply isn't there, it is frustrating...

I get some payment for freelance writing but it's maybe a couple thousand a yr (if I am lucky and productive)... And we are too far out in the country to pay gas to drive to the city for a job (and pay for before or after school childcare)....

I keep hoping one day we'll "get ahead" and be able to actually take a family holiday or not have to count pennies (especially the week before payday) but it never seems to get any easier...

And then there is the $7.5K PLUS in back child support arrears that it would be such a blessing to collect upon... I keep hoping and praying that a miracle will happen and "the Respondent" will get a job and live up to his obligations as a father....

Anyway, thanks for your post... I am glad you ARE able to stay at home with your little brood... They will be gone, all too soon, and there will then be time for other pursuits... I know mine are growing too fast... tonight is preschool graduation... Yesterday I gave my wee (big) girl a hug and ended up crying little tears into her warm little neck... not sure why... just hit me how special she is and how fleeting the time is....

Blessings,

Yer Cousin

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