Tuesday, April 28, 2009


That morning, bright and early, i got up and worked for over an hour on an idea for a blogpost that i had started the night before. Everyone was still asleep & in the quiet, i could just write whatever i felt like.
The ideas just flowed & took the exact shape that i wanted them to. When i proofread it, all i had to do was add an 's' or a comma. & then blogger froze... & after a few stupid errors on my part, i lost my post.
i felt *horrible*. It was a post where i felt like i finally got down in words something that i've always sort of felt & wondered. i went back & rewrote what i could remember, but the words were blocky & didn't flow. There were some ideas that went back to being 'thoughts without words' & i never did capture them again. & then the kids got up... my house got noisy. i feel like i could cry.
If it were a post about anything but Caleb & Hope - i don't think i would care. But, i feel like i lost a little tiny piece of something very precious that i very much wanted to have been able to put into words.
i reworked the post as well as i could & that is what i posted yesterday.
Still not the same - but... what can you do?
Blogging to me has become a bit of a release.
A place to bear my heart - to discover the things that are most important to me...
To possibly capture some fleeting moments, thoughts, images from these years...
To point to Jesus.
As you can see from my sidebar, i'm trying my best to try to start labeling my posts... 's not as much fun as you would think. It's gonna take me awhile, but hopefully in the end it will help my blog be more readable. And maybe when reading posts about Caleb and Hope, more people will meet The Comforter - My King - My Jesus.
i started this blog with the intent that my focus would be prolife.
i'm learning daily that being a momma *is* some of the most important prolife work happening out there. i hope that this little spot on the world wide web brings glory to God.


The Nieboer News said...

I know that feeling of loosing a post. I feel so 'full' as I'm writing it and getting the thoughts from my head to the screen. and then.... they are just gone....and the feeling suddenly switches to emptiness, like a piece of me has gone with it. And you can't get it to come back, blogger needs some more 'blockers' so that you actually have to 'delete' or something.

I thought yesterdays post was perfect.

Lisa said...

That's a bummer Paige. I hate when that happens.

Luke said...

I'm so sorry you lost the post. And you double checked to make sure it's not saved as a "Draft" in your edit posts section? Just in case... maybe...?


Jen said...

That makes me sad.
I find blogging a 'release' too. I wish tho sometimes that a few people who read my blog, actually didn't read it. I would like to open up a bit more, really write out my thoughts...but I'm often held back.


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