Monday, May 18, 2009

Nursing a 15 month old

He pushes my arm away as i try to stroke his hair that has become coarser in just a few short months.
"Are you done?"
He shakes his head emphatically "no" expertly keeping his latch. His blue eyes don't leave mine & i'm feeling a kink start in my neck keeping my head cocked to the side to keep my eyes locked on those precious, thickly lashed baby eyes.
His head has a huge bruise across it from when he fell & banged into our bed the other day while running around like a crazy man. He's such a little mover & shaker.
"Do you want the other side?"
i'm fairly certain that i've been emptied on this side, but again, he shakes his head & mumbles "MhmMhm"
It's not milk he's looking for, it's comfort.
He hardly ever nurses to sleep anymore, but i sense his body relaxing across mine. He keeps kicking, kicking, kicking & shoving his grubby little fingers all over my face, forcing their way through my lips, pulling hair, my necklace, my chin... trying to stave off sleep with activity.
Suddenly he laughs. Carefully keeping his latch - a tired muffled giggle escapes & i can't help but mirror it.
There is tumult outside my door - there is peace within, holding this boy in my arms preparing for sleep.
Somewhere in the back of my mind i hear the voices i've heard, "When they can ask for it, that's when i draw the line..." & i picture my son just a few minutes prior to this cozy scene, crying & pulling on the front of my shirt... "When they have more than a few teeth, that's when i draw the line," my little guy has a whole mouthful of teeth that most of the time he remembers to keep to himself. " Once they can drink from a cup, what do they need it for?" He has been expertly drinking from a cup for weeks now - & yet...
We're not done yet.
Where did that needy, toothless uncoordinated partner go who started this nursing journey with me? Tiny rooting mouth seeking, seeking, finding, losing, crying, trying again - ... relief... success...
The solid toddler in my arms has replaced that tiny baby - confidently latching on & settling in to the comfort that he knows will follow.
i don't know when this little partnership will end, but i know it's not over yet - & for some reason, i know that this is a comfort to us both.

29 comments:

Stephanie (Van Neck) Fidelak said...

Your writing intrigues and fascinates me Paige. I love reading your works and frequently check in.
I nursed my 3rd until 18 months and cherished every moment and am currently nursing my 11 month old. Those are the sweet moments to remember.
:o)

Lisa said...

There are so many good antibodies and nutrients that only the breast can provide :) Comfort aside, that milk is sooooo good for him, and for you. The benefits of breastfeeding go far beyond providing food :)

Of course you know all this already, but its good to be reminded!

Besides for the naysayers, the WHO and calgary health region encourage breastfeeding to 2 years old. So hey it must be good ;)

Prvbs31Mama said...

OH how I ache to be able to exclusively nurse my little man...I'm going to the next LaLeche League meeting...hopefully they can help me with weaning him off the nasty bottle...sigh. Tears of frustration overwhelm me as I remember the exact feelings you write about from my last little nursling...yet, determination is slowly starting to show up in my attempt to succeed in breastfeeding.

Sherilyn said...

The World Health organization actually recommends nursing until 3 now. They say that the antibodies in breastmilk spike around 18mo as that is when little ones start to interact more and come in contact with more germs.
All that aside-I couldn't give it up and neither did my kids want to until we were both ready. 24 months with the first, 25mo with the second. I wouldn't trade those moments for anything in the world.

jessica jespersen said...

I agree with Steph F.. I love reading your posts. This is the second visit in one day to read it over again. :) It is a beautiful thing when babe settles in to a contented nurse and even more rewarding as they begin their second year as there is a different kind of comfort to the nursing at that stage that is mellowing for both mama and babe isn't there. I remember Sadie being so snuggly and appreciative nursing at 18 mo.-j

jessica jespersen said...

ps. Wesley is right now at the "let me pull your hair and stick my ginsue-knife fingernails in your eyes" stage of nursing. hee hee. Looking forward to a less "active" nurser in the months to come!?-j

Jen said...

My favorite is when they look up at you with those big beautiful eyes and smile...like they are saying "thanks mommy - i love you"...

The Nieboer News said...

this post makes me ache for another one

Molly said...

Oh, this post just about made me cry. Nursing a toddler is brand new to me I never anticipated that we would both be enjoying it so much. I just love that special time we share!

I'll admit, I was one of those -"when they can ask for it" and "when they get teeth" people. Oh, how I've eaten my words!

Anonymous said...

Personally the nursing thing creeps me out. Don't beat yourself up, Proverbs 31 Mother for giving an occasional bottle... I wasn't into breast feeding and neither were my children (who screamed and turned red and wouldn't latch on -- I honestly thought my son was demon possessed because feeding times were such a stress!) So formula and bottles did the trick for me... and I would go that route again if another baby came along. Maybe I am just not a granola crunching hippy type, I don't know... If both Mum and Baby enjoy it, fine... but it isn't good to "guilt trip" new Mums into thinking they HAVE TO nurse or that somehow they are less of a mother if they choose to feed their children with a bottle. I even tried pumping (didn't help that I had a badly inverted nipple and the dr. didn't bother to suggest wearing nipple shields in pregnancy to try to get it to pop out.) Didn't like that "I'm a big old Jersey cow feeling" -- some ladies I talk to have said the same thing - that somehow the whole thing seemed degrading. Sorry, but that's my comment!
Your much older cousin - Denise from Saskatchewan!

mamazee said...

love this, and jessie's post, too - now i want to write about babe Meow...
:)
You know how we call it "num nums" or make that clicky sound with our mouths? she loves that, but when she is pawing at the neckline of my tshirt, she is saying "boos,, boos..." sigh... NOt quite as cute!
But i love the way God made us - that beautiful sense of things being as they were designed to be - i love how He created milk to be the perfect food for a tiny human, at the perfect temperature, with the perfect ratio of fats, proteins, carbs, changing as baby grows. I love that my antibodies are passed on. I love that my risk of breast cancer decreases by 3% for every year i breastfeed (i crunched the numbers and i'm into negative percentages now LOL!)
I love having something to give when we are stuck, hot, thirsty, hungry, or something to smooth on scratches if we are out in the bush. Love how it's antibacterial and anti fungal... It's such a miracle that God created our bodies to do such good to and for the little ones we've carried beneath our hearts for those long hidden months...

Natalia said...

I'm Natalia from the old mamas mailing list - and via Stephanie. I loved this post and it reminded me of something I wrote 2 years ago that I'd totally forgotten! http://blogcabininthewest.blogspot.com/2007/05/little-boy-baby.html Those complex mama perceptions--I wish it were easier to put them into words sometimes!

Thank you for sharing!

Natalia

Natalia said...

PS. I'm still nursing the Boy-Baby I just wrote about (who just turned 3 --thanks for that info, Sherilyn, I don't feel so unusual now!--- as well as the new baby. I never tandemed before but it's very special. In fact I think the boy emotionally needs the mommy-time more than the baby does!

Grace said...

This is beautiful. It's so beautiful when a mom is in tune with her baby and warmly embraces nursing.
A little taken aback by the harsh comments from the cousin. There is nothing creepy or awful about breastfeeding. I find that it is a wonderful perscription for quieting the mom and calming her to be a gentle momma.
And nursing does not come easy to all moms. I had to work so hard at making it work; had to study my own body. But near the end I managed to nurse up to age 3. How wonderful it was. God is good.
And yes, breastfeeding is better than bottle. I'm thankful there is substitute milk for those who need it, but the sub. will never be as good as the breast milk. JMHO.

Anonymous said...

Grace --
My comment was not intended to be "harsh" -- I was just stating that breastfeeding was not a "warm fuzzy" for me. Unfortunately sometimes proponents of breastfeeding are very "harsh" (to use the same word!) on those of us who choose not to breastfeed our babies but go the alternate route. My own Mother is probably still mad at me for refusing to breastfeed.

I was not comfortable with nursing and it wasn't working for me, yet I was pressured time and time again, not to give up and to continue on doing this thing which caused so much stress to both baby and myself. Even when I had quit attempting to breastfeed some people were trying to persuade me to relactate!! I thought they were totally crazy...

So all I am saying is -- if it is working for you, great. But don't force your views on others who might prefer another method of providing nutrition to their infant! You say in your own post "Breastfeeding is better than bottle." -- Well, I agree that the nutritional content of the breast milk is better than the nutritional content of the formula BUT -- you can't say breast is better than bottle. For you, it was. For me, it wasn't. Would you rather have an upset Mum and a starving baby or a calmer Mum and a quiet, contented baby because his tummy is full...

And... if you are nursing, please be sensitive to those around you when you do so. I have seen people sit on a stack of dogfood in the grocery store and pull out their breast. Or whipping it out while sitting in church during the sermon. Neither place is appropriate! You may think you are being "discreet" nursing under a blanket in church but everyone knows what you are doing and it is probably distracting to others in the congregation. I know it was very distracting to me a couple weeks ago when the lady across the aisle started taking her bra apart etc. -- and she was in about the third row of a very small church (like 20 people or less).

I noticed a nice sign a couple weeks ago in the washroom at the Royal Tyrell Museum in Drumheller. It said if you are a nursing mother, please contact one of our staff and we will be pleased to show you a nice quiet place to go with your baby. I thought that was really going above and beyond but it was nice to see that the Museum was catering to breastfeeding Mums.

Cousin Denise - AGAIN!

paige said...

Yeh, well, this post was meant to be an encouragement - & a tiny time capsule of a delicious time with my son. The parts of your post that were harsh were the references to the jersey cow and that nursing "creeps you out" and that it's "degrading" - nothing in the comments section before your comment or the post itself were meant to be inflamatory - nor were they pushing breastfeeding as the only alternative. Breastfeeding mothers (especially after 4 months of age) are in the minority in this country - & i'm trying to share a little of the joy that goes along with this intimate time for *me*... i'm so sorry that you were unable to breastfeed your children - but i don't think that this post is insensitive or inappropriate. i'm hoping instead that it will be an encouragement to new mommas to consider breastfeeding longer than the accepted norm and see the beauty in the relationship.
If mommas don't want to 's ok. i just won't do a post about formula 'cause i don't know much about it & it's not what we've used around here...
i also find it discouraging the oversexualizing of the breast in our society - It's hard enough breastfeeding (you know that yourself!) without being shamed by others for not being discreet enough. We're all doing our best. i'm sure i've flashed a time or two too - i've tried not to, but it's a delicate balancing act sometimes. i've noticed that a lot of moms have switched to bottles in public - likely because of such pressure. That's too bad. If more people could see the *good*, i think we'd have higher success rates for extended breastfeeding in this country.
No need to respond to this comment :)

mamazee said...

Isaiah 5:20

Woe to those who call evil good
and good evil,
who put darkness for light
and light for darkness,
who put bitter for sweet
and sweet for bitter.

jessica jespersen said...

I wouldn't be able to go anywhere if i was expected to not nurse in public. My babies are fussy, active little ones. I *do* think that our culture has some "boob issues". Breastfeeding is somehow seen as something sexual and obscene instead of something that has been designed (!!) :) especially for the convenience of both baby and mama. It *is* great that there is an alternative for when things just don't go as planned though. I experienced that agony this past month when i was torn over how to be with Sadie in the hospital and still nurse Wes. I bought a can of formula just in case but didn't end up needing it. Life is hard enough sometimes. :) We as women can become guilt ridden over so many of the little details of who we are and our roles as mamas. For me, these posts of Paige's are always an encouragement to be *tender* with our little ones and to enjoy motherhood and our children in whatever way we *are* able to enjoy it. Keep posting these little moments of joy from your life Paige, they keep me watching out for my own moments of joy and peace and thanksgiving. You are a blessing to me... and I'm sure many others too. --j

Anonymous said...

Paige:

Although you say there "is no need to respond" I feel the need to do so :)

Firstly -- if you check the original post, the reference to feeling it was "degrading" and "feeling like a jersey cow" were both in regard to being hooked up to the breast pumping machine. I am not the only woman who has seen the similarity to a cow hooked to a milking machine as I recently had a conversation with a lady who gave birth in Lloydminster and her baby was airlifted to Grande Prairie (since there wasn't proper neonatal care here because the ward was full) -- and she said exactly the same thing about hating the machine for the same reasons!

Secondly -- I was not trying to be inflammatory or to cause a controversy with my comment. However, precisely BECAUSE the other comments were all very pro-breastfeeding, it seemed appropriate that the other side of the issue be brought forward. Bottle feeding wasn't mentioned in your initial post at all.

The other side being that breastfeeding does not work for everyone (for various and sundry reasons) and those who chose to use bottles and formula should not be judged by those who chose to either exclusively breastfeed or breast feed but with supplementation by bottle, (as the Proverbs31 Mother above describes) depending on circumstances.

I found the nurses in the maternity ward were next to useless in assisting with teaching how to breastfeed. They were so busy if they did try to "help" all they did was roughly shove the baby's head in the direction of the nipple and then disappear again. I'd already been in hospital from Sunday until Thursday and was finally released and struggling with breastfeeding and my father was angry that they had let me out without having breastfeeding properly established! And my mother wasn't much help because she just got frustrated and exasperated with the situation. But despite knowing the difficulties I had with the whole process, she got mad at me when I gave up and went to bottlefeeding to ease the stress involved.

And I did try breastfeeding for several weeks -- even going to see a lactation consultant on a couple of occasions. That was fine when I was "in the office" and the lady was giving "hands on" assistance. However, the consultant was in N. Battleford and I was living in Lloydminster, so when we were at home without support it was a whole different ballgame.

One nurse claimed (and I don't have any research on this to prove whether it is true or false) that mothers who were "older" at the time of delivery (I was 37 with the first one and 43 with the second) and who had difficult birth experiences (emergency C-section for example) had a much harder time being able to settle into breastfeeding. Interesting theory but I have no proof if there is any truth to it....

Regardless, breastfeeding Mums need to be sensitive to others who may not have the same enthusiasm or passion for this method of delivering nutrition to an infant.

Whether you have experienced it or not, many breastfeeding Mums ARE judgmental towards those of us who don't. We have all been in baby rooms at the back of a church, for example. If you disagree with formula, be careful of how you react when someone pulls a bottle out of a diaper bag instead of nursing their child. Perhaps it is a subconcious thing but many people seem to "look down" upon the woman who does not breastfeed. Silence and staring daggers at a new Mum isn't the way to go! She is no less of a parent for this decision. It is just a different journey.

Continued

Anonymous said...

Precisely because breasts are so sexualized, women (whether they are breastfeeding or not) have an obligation to make sure they are well covered and are modestly clothed. Look in a full length mirror before you leave the house. Make sure your shirt isn't super tight or your skirt so short that you bend over and bare all to the world. If you are breastfeeding, chose your location to do so carefully. You don't want to cause a Christian (or non-Christian) brother to stumble. I really am glad I am ot a man because there are too many women these days sporting belly button rings and low cut shirts with push-up type bras running around (even in evangelical circles where women should know better!)

I only mentioned the woman in church breastfeeding in the third row to suggest to others, who may be currently lactating, to stop and think for a second about when and where they perform this bodily function. It was obvious to me that the woman in church was getting many stares (and that many men were what I would call "ogling" the poor woman.) The pastor had no choice and had to watch, as he was captive at the front. It would have been very easy for the lady to get up and walk the ten feet to the back of the church and sit on a chair in the kitchen where she would have been "out of the line of vision" of the majority of the congregation. Probably she simply "didn't think" about any options she had -- she was probably so wrapped up in dealing with her baby's immediate needs. But it would have only taken a minute to relocate and it would have eliminated the ogling and lessened the distraction to others who were trying to take notes on the Gospel of John.

Being forced to have an emergency C-section was a different birth journey for me than any of your vaginal births -- but my journey to motherhood was not better or worse than yours. Sure, I had to suffer more, due to having major abdominal surgery. But we both ended up with a healthy baby in our arms in the end, and for that I am grateful.

Am I any less of a mother because I had to have the child surgically removed from my womb. Of course not (although that WAS something that I struggled with emotionally for some time after my son was born). It was different with my daughter -- not only because I knew what a C-Section was like, but because I was able to choose to have surgery. I could have tried to labour, but might have ended up in another emergency situation. And so, at 43, it seemed easier to agree to another section. And I am not less of a mother because I chose to bottle feed my infant. And I shouldn't be judged as "harsh" for making the choice that was the right one for me.

Jessie is right - your posts are very tender and it is obvious that you have great unconditional love for your children and great love and support from Neil. Unfortunately that total spousal support is something I have not encountered until very recently. Thank goodness that I do feel loved and appreciated now... it makes a huge difference on all mental, physical and emotional levels.

Continued

Anonymous said...

Even though we don't have a lot in common, I read your posts in the hope of getting to know you better and connecting with my "long lost" cousins. I could have just as easily posted my misconstrued comments on Stephanie or Jessie's blogs -- I wasn't singling you out, in particular. And I wasn't suggesting that your original post was inappropriate or insensitive. I was just making comments from my own personal experience. What if another reader had also struggled with breastfeeding and felt she could not share that with you because of your "gung-ho" positive stance. Both sides of the picture should be shown. If I can't make comments from my own personal experience on here, then perhaps I shouldn't be reading this blog!

I am glad you find a connection and joy in breastfeeding your children. And I am glad you want to encourage others to feel that same connection. If this is your particular passion, maybe you could volunteer to be a breastfeeding assistant at your local hospital and go in and help teach young mothers to bond with their infants.

For some of us, it is probably too late to make a difference in that regard (as the doctor recently told me it would be "next to impossible" for me, at 46 years and 9 months, to get pregnant. After my miscarriage in November 2007, that's extremely disappointing.) You and Stephanie are both lucky to have had another child so quickly after your recent "losses." Others have not been quite so fortunate...

So now you know where I am coming from...

~ Cousin Denise.

jessica jespersen said...

Denise... I find myself "taken aback" by your comments as well... not so much for what you are saying as that you would feel so condemned from such a tender post that to me was a beautiful image of mother and child. I'm sure you could write one just as moving of one or two of your experiences. You have writing background, and sweet little ones and you could use your talents to *encourage* mothers who *you* feel need it... Speaking from a nursing mama's point of view, *i* needed this one. :) I understand from your long responses that motherhood/family has been a hard journey. I believe though that there is always time to trade in bitterness, envy, anger and judgement for freedom, and joy. It's not too late to *enjoy* this role!! I hope Paige's posts can encourage you to do just that. -j

paige said...

Well, i guess in this, as in many areas, we will have to agree to disagree. This post is only about breastfeeding because this is my teeny corner of the internet. There are a million other sites where women can debate the pros and cons of breast & bottle - but this little post isn't a debate where both sides of an argument need to be heard. This is my life & a little piece of *my* heart. i don't feel like i need to (or want to) placate *everyone* by bringing up all sides to an argument that i'm not in. i'm not preaching here - i'm just sharin' a teeny bit of our life... & this particular post was about breastfeeding. If someone can't relate because they've had different circumstances, that's ok too - many people who read my blog don't know Jesus either, but i'm not gonna quit posting about Him because there are different religions out there... Many people struggle with infertility. i'm not going to stop talking about motherhood. Many people have never gone through a miscarriage. i'm not going to be silent about my little ones in heaven.
& so, feel free to come - to comment gently - to choose your words carefully (i know i do!) & to get to know me if you want to.
i know that things in your own life have been very hard - & that you have come through (& are going through) very painful things.
Keep looking to Jesus.

Anonymous said...

People can be hurt by things that others don't realize... like the pregnant women waddling around hurt me right now because they make me revisit my recent loss and the probable permanence of it all.

I guess this post hit a raw nerve because it paints motherhood and breastfeeding in a totally positive light and doesn't suggest that anyone might struggle with the issue. It just seems too rosy to be realistic. Others do struggle with it.

I HAVE had people look at me bottlefeeding in distain and be "mean" and "unkind" by their actions without knowing all the full circumstances. All I was saying is have a bit of empathy for others who have to journey different paths! Perhaps ask the woman bottlefeeding in the nursery if you can be of help to her - maybe she just needs someone to come alongside. Go visit a new mother once a day for the first couple weeks and help her with her breastfeeding if that is what she wants to do and is having problems.

Everyone in the whole church knew I was having a C-Section, second time round - like 150 people in the congregation and only one lady thought to bring over a meal. Where is the Christian fellowship... not very forthcoming!

Unfortunately, in my 9 years of motherhood I have felt far more condemnation than praise. My mother-in-law went so far as to tell me my son should be an only child and I shouldn't have any more kids (as if it was any of her business). When I was pregnant briefly in 2007 - at 45, supposedly godly family members snidely said to me, "Are you trying to have a baby with Downs Syndrome." Totally uncalled for! And little to no sympathy when it all ended in tragedy. "It's for the best" over and over again. Or "It is not meant to be." Well, how did THEY know that. The hurt of miscarriage should be acknowledge and treated as an occasion to give sympathy - no matter the circumstances of conception.

There are probably lots of women out there that have had the same type of negative experiences.

I am not saying breastfeeding is wrong. I am only saying that it should be said somewhere that it is perfectly okay for women to choose not to breastfeed and they shouldn't feel less of a person for doing so. That never happened in my case and I did feel that friends and relatives alike held grudges against me because of my choice. It is a moot point now because my kids are almost 10 and 4.

And yes, Jessie, I do love my children and am glad that I am a mother. Within the last few months probably, I have been able to relax a little bit and occasionally stop and laugh at what my littles are doing and realize that they are only small once. Enjoying the moment instead of being worried when the next crisis was going to hit. Seeing them as a blessing instead of a burden... Inner healing is a very slow process... it is coming but it is not something that happens overnight.

All I am asking is to be heard... and for people to think twice about how their actions and words affect and sometimes unintentionally hurt others...even those close to you!

And... that's my last word!

D.

paige said...

D, i'm glad it's your last word 'cause i think we've covered all the bases.
Yes, this post focused on the loveliness of breastfeeding. Maybe someday i will post about the difficulty of breastfeeding - but *this* post, was meant to focus on the loveliness.
i really hope that you take a quick peek at your posts one more time to see that we could all have a little more grace... (think of the breastfeeding momma you mentioned sitting on the stack of dogfood - or the one so hungry for a sermon because of her sleepless baby filled nights that she chose to breastfeed during the sermon) i can't answer for the mommas who gave you dirty looks when you bottle fed, but i'm sure we've all had our choices questioned at one time or another & i'm sure those mommas could have used a little more kindness too.
i don't think we always have to talk about how *hard* it is... Sometimes, we just need to sit back & drink in the beauty of one moment in time.

mamazee said...

Denise, you have the choice to read P's blog or not. You also have the choice to write your own blog about hard things that are not mentioned on this one but that are part of your own walk and world. Asking others to blog about things that they know nothing about to satisfy your sense of justice is just bizarre. A blog is like a diary, not a mini UN. Sorry that others didn't weep with you when you were weeping - it's biblical, isn't it? and it hurts when others ignore our pain. The Bible also says to rejoice with those who are rejoicing, and that is a blessing, too, to share our joy in the good things God has done...

Anonymous said...

Jessie:
I appreciate your sensitivity, and your suggestiong that I should write about my life experiences. But would you honestly read a blog about a wife being abused by her husband. I doubt that many people would want to know about the fear rising within someone's heart about if this could be the day he would lash out yet again. And even if someone was wanting to read that sort of thing, it probably isn't the best to dredge it all up.

I agree it is good to rejoice with others and focus on the good times and the memory making moments but I think that is precisely part of the frustration I am feeling at the moment.

You are right that people were not there to weep with me or assist in my time of need -- like maybe they should have been. I think it was easier for them to pretend everything was okay and not have to deal with the ugly reality.

But, unfortunately, almost no one has been there to rejoice with me in better times, either. Very few people attended my wedding (and I understand many had legitimate reasons for not coming). And hardly anyone bothered to even send a card. It was like the non-event of the year! And silence can easily be misinterpreted!

Having very few friends in the first place and then getting the cold shoulder from the church congregation means that I feel even more isolated and alone, and struggling along unsupported on a uphill climb isn't easy!

And I know you've had a difficult journey with family health issues the last while yourself (I've been copying and pasting your blog entries about Sadie's health to my Mum who prays but isn't tech savvy). I'm glad that seems to be getting a little easier for you. I can empathize since your girl and mine are almost the same age and I can imagine what it would be like if it was Isobel with the same symptoms.

~Denise

jessica jespersen said...

Denise, When moments have been hard, i find it even more important to write out the good/funny/light moments so that i don't begin a spiral into despair. (So easy to begin that descent for *many* of us!!) I know not everyone is the same, but i *do* know that you have enjoyed writing throughout your life, and for most of us who do, it is because of it's cathartic, healing benefits... :) It is frustrating that the horrible moments are so hard to forget and the moments of *bliss* are so easily are burried under the everyday memories. I was thinking just that last night as i snuggled under a blanket on the outdoor swing with Sadie. I didn't want to forget that split second with the wind, leaves, frogs, dog barking and the two of us. Some moments are worth memorializing. I'd suggest you start with the ones that will more easily slip away (even if it's a split second in time) rather than the ones that you feel at the moment are such deep gaping wounds. Those memories aren't going anywhere anytime soon. I disagree that people wouldn't want to read a blog concerning your life... i do believe that there is a healing work yet to be done though. It *isn't* false (even though it may feel like it at the moment) to write down the blessings just because the curses have been so heavy. Keep your eyes on the One who lifts us up out of the mire and onto a ROCK. You *are* loved. My friend Andrea and I like to remind each other of the verse that says: "I am my Beloved's and He is mine, His banner over me is LOVE." His eye is heavy with love on you too...and you are *HIS* alone.--j

Christine said...

I am still nursing my 22 month old, and am loving it. Not that it isn't without hardships, at times! :)Many blessings to you!

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails

playlist