i've been watching - quietly, safely, thoughtfully - from my home these recent days as others have been attacked and slandered for holding the same beliefs that i have.
i've been praying for my brothers and sisters as they work valiantly, humbly, brokenly and vulnerably. Truth is not welcome in every corner of Canada - and to shine truth's light into dark corners requires sacrifice.
And as i've prayed, i've found that my thoughts keep turning stubbornly... to the One i love... who continues to shape the beliefs that hold me. He is truth and light and love... For Him, there are no confusing rules about 'loving the sinner and hating the sin' - He holds all in His hands... and sees us clearly - to the very depths of who we are... and He calls us to be reconciled to Him.
He loves the angry pro-choicer hurtling obscenities... and the indignant, prideful pro-lifer who throws them capably back... He loves the atheist homosexual who mocks Abba Father... and the hypocrite Christian who closes the church doors against those who seek. He loves me with my lack of grace... just as much as He loves those who laughingly continue in sin so that grace may abound.
i know this seems like some kind of impossible, hokey post... and maybe in my wrestling through this issue, that's all this is... But i'm overwhelmed these days with love for a Saviour who breaths truth. i'm undone by His compassion and the merciful way that He has chosen to use us - mere infants - to rescue each other.
And no... i can't make anyone else understand my love for Him. i can't always speak through the hurt that was inflicted in His name, i can't explain the Truth that brings about transforming clarity, i can't show anyone exactly how He's going to ask them to live, see and believe - if they choose to take up their cross and follow Him. Will the alcoholic remain so? Will the gossiper be freed? Will the slanderer repent and the vilest offender be drawn into Holiness? i don't know...
i can only take up my own cross... i can walk humbly with my God, i can act justly - Oh Father! Make me a lover of mercy...
And i do this because i love Him. i follow Him because He sees me, has compassion on me - and in His mercy - has drawn me into relationship. The beauty of my Father continues to draw me further in, to seek Him tirelessly, to be held in His gaze and tended as His child. i'm taking up my cross - (oh easy yoke and light burden to bear!) - and i'm following Him.