Monday, May 5, 2008

i changed my profile comments ~
Somehow i felt that i couldn't just post about *life* ~
Now, i gave myself that little freedom.
Neil & i had a neat conversation about prayer. It seems funny ~ that He keeps bringing me back to *prayer*. i think He wants my first instinct to be seeing prayer as a way to get intimate & build relationship.
Neil said, "yeah... but when i talk to my dad, he talks back..."
& yes, God does too...but...
but ~ i've had seasons where He's been silent. i remember really clearly, that He felt almost palpable while i carried Hope ~ & yet, after baby was delivered ~ it felt like He was silent.
Anyway, my mom addressed a bit of this in an email & she's always got such good stuff to say.

I believe that He deliberately withdraws at times….not that He isn’t there….or doesn’t care….but to allow us to practice trusting Him, and to practice living his life. If He was there moment by moment telling us each move to make and each word to say…..(well just imagine if we did that to OUR children)…would we ever grow up to be (in the words of D.Willard) “the kind of person that He could set free to do whatever WE WANT in the world?” If an eagle kept bringing food to it’s offspring and never let it learn to fly and hunt….would the offspring ever become a true eagle?

The idea that we can even have *relationship* with God ~ maybe seems so unbelievable ~ that we give up when we should try harder. We don't hear Him, so we stop listening... We can't touch, or see Him, so we conclude He isn't there. We hurt, so He must not care.
God is Good. He sees, He hears, He has compassion. So much of this relationship, must be based on *faith* & *hope* ~ (we hope for what we do not see...)
i love that verse: Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (romans 12:12)
's where i'm at today...

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