Remember Manna

Remember Manna
Remember the great seas part
Remember Manna
He hears the cry of our hearts

From slavery led,
the hungry fed,
He's still the same-
He'll hear again-
Remember manna.

He is worthy, worthy, He is worthy, worthy
He hears our cries
He sees our pain
He has compassion - remember manna.

A Gathering

Yesterday was a big day.
Woke at 6, travelled for three and a half hours to arrive at my sister's house to meet my new nephew for the first time. i felt so guilty crashing in at her place with my 6 littles creating chaos, & yet... not guilty enough to stay home.
Neil had work to do in the city, so we were there for the day & then he came & picked us up & we left around 8pm, arriving home close to midnight. In the midst of the tangle of our 12 children, my oldest sister couldn't miss out on the fun & packed up her little brood & drove the 3 hours from Hinton to make it a *full house*. Between the 3 of us, there are 19 children... 3 in diapers, 2 barely out of them, 1 who turned 13 in November & then a whole bunch in between.
Sometimes i wonder what it would be like to live closer... where we could all just go out in an evening, just us 3 girls ~ & carry on a conversation ~ "passing the ball" back & forth without it being hijacked by hurt fingers, or feelings, or markers on window sills, or poopy bums, hungry tummies & eavesdropping pre-teens. ~
But maybe sentences, thoughts, & conversations are supposed to be captured in tiny colourful pieces right now. i don't remember *what* we were talking about when that little husky, curly haired boy cried because he lost his 'bouncy ball'... but i remember how sweet he looked with his lips turned down, till little elfin princess found it for him & restored his *joy*. i remember that Robin, 7, is an artist... & Ellie, 5, can spell & read better than any other 5 year old i know. i remember that Wyatt, 13, is addicted to his baby sister, Mielle, 8mo, & i wished i could put superglue on his shoulders so i wouldn't be afraid of her falling off that high perch (when did his shoulders get so high & broad??) i remember Sadie's grin when i got to rescue her from her too short nap. i remember arms intertwined, cousins pairing off, wrestling matches, cheering for baby's wobbly steps to show off for proud aunties... & most sweetly, inhaling that new little boy who changes our mix yet again with his perfect nose & downy soft hair, nestling closer to escape the noise that he'll add to soon enough.
Welcome to our world, baby Wesley.

The Good & The Bad

Have you ever read this story?
This farmer had only one horse, and one day the horse ran away. The neighbors came to condole over his terrible loss. The farmer said, "What makes you think it is so terrible?"
A month later, the horse came home--this time bringing with her two beautiful wild horses. The neighbors became excited at the farmer's good fortune. Such lovely strong horses! The farmer said, "What makes you think this is good fortune?"
The farmer's son was thrown from one of the wild horses and broke his leg. All the neighbors were very distressed. Such bad luck! The farmer said, "What makes you think it is bad?"
A war came, and every able-bodied man was conscripted and sent into battle. Only the farmer's son, because he had a broken leg, remained. The neighbors congratulated the farmer. "What makes you think this is good?" said the farmer.

i know... 's not a bible story :) but it makes me think of how i am with God sometimes. It's like an artist painting a picture with a 4 year old peeking over their shoulder asking, "What's that? Why did you do that? Is that a mistake? Are ya gonna fix that blob of paint? You should add a SUNSHINE... or a FROG!!" ~ Surely we can help God create His masterpiece.
Surrender.
We get so tired... trying to orchestrate... trying to analyze, trying to comprehend, explain, find meaning to the mundane, the painful, the miraculous... but through it all....
God just *is*.
Weaving, creating, remaining constant, compassionate and faithful.
Surrender.
My prayers have become surrender.
Ah, God, i hurt.
i know.
God, i don't see how this will work out.
i'm still in control, Paige.
i trust you, Father.

& i do.
i trust Him now, when life has been so full of blessing, i'm afraid to exhale & disrupt a single thing. i trusted Him then... when i didn't want to wake up in the morning. i'll trust Him come what may ~ when i see His hand, or when i long to see Him take action. When he shows me a miracle, or when i have to choose to believe without seeing. When i think a situation brings only bad, & He turns it for His Glory... or when a situation that i think is good, seems to turn bad.

So, take me, Father. Shape me... Do it Your way. Help me see past the blobs of paint or the seeming tangle of threads to Your masterpiece. Give me wisdom and patience to grow 'till my desires mirror Yours.
amen

More Moments

In our Honda van that is packed to the gills this summer, all of a sudden a shrill voice (molls) pipes up from the back seat: PEOPLE!!!!! i'm not COMFORTABLE back here!!!
(um, really? 'cause i thought cramming 8 people like sardines into a smallish van for 11 hours sounds exceedingly comfortable...)
And, apparently, they're making cartoons cuter than they did when i was a kid, 'cause this shout was heard from the basement one day: Peyton: CAI, SLOAN!!! You gotta come see this!! Diego's in a BATHING SUIT!!!
And, here's one that isn't even from my kids. Sloan & Cai were babysitting at the church today & Cai asked a little girl, 'does your daddy play the guitar?' & she softly replied, 'yes. And my mommy does the dishes' :) Awwwwww...

An Announcement

While eating lunch on Saturday, i was startled to look up & see my eldest standing on her chair clearing her throat....
Cairo: (ahem) I have an announcement to make.
(all forks stop moving & all eyes turn to her)
Cairo: First of all, i would like to thank Mollen and Charter for being more diligent with brushing their teeth. This is making the world a better place. Now, if you would quit dripping toothpaste all over my bathroom, your efforts would be much appreciated.
Thank you.
(Cairo sits down... forks resume movement... another moment captured from the loony bin).